The Pursuit of Happiness
By Dr Elior Kinarthy
What makes an ordinary place a happy place? Bargains and tasty fruit and farm fresh vegetables at a discount, wonderful music, welcoming volunteers and sitting together chatting and eating delicious kosher hot dogs. Come to the Saanich Green Market!
A simple definition of happiness is feeling good about your decisions and other events where you receive rewards. In other words, happiness is always conditional. A good example of conditional happiness is winning the lottery and being rewarded with a large sum of money.
(Ironically, people who win lotteries most often end up unhappy as they were not raised or conditioned to be able to handle a sudden reversal of fortune. Most people end up financially and emotionally worse off than before.)
How does one become happy, regardless of childhood experiences or the surrounding environment? Happiness consists of two major areas, early childhood upbringing and societal influences. Early childhood is the most crucial stage of life as every child is born narcissistic and happy. How do you raise happy children? Children are more secure when they have established limits. Discipline should stop bad behaviour while explaining to the child why this behaviour is not acceptable. This gives guidance and is vital to establish the link between behaviour and its consequences. The result is a child that is secure and functioning well in society, without any sociopathic or psychopathic tendencies.
Happiness is in the mind and conditional, and joy comes from the soul. Since the soul is 99% creative thinking, and it’s not based on conditions, it’s inherent and creative. You can simply declare “I have joy” and this comes from deep within your being and your soul. Then you can create more happiness and choose from the following methods:
Begin by developing free will, and that comes with the awareness that something in your approach to life is no longer working.
Stop blaming your parents, society, employers, etc., for your situation in life.
Change your behaviours by rewarding yourself every time you do something positive or make a good decision.
In both verbal and non-verbal communication be positive. Don’t do or say negative things about yourself, your mind or your body.
Say positive things about yourself in the mirror for 5 minutes every day. This helps you to “act” happy and that will eventually transform to being happy.